I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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