One girl and one boy is just not enough.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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