carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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