They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
