i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
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