You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
