I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
