I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
