used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Come on in and take your pants off
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