She's JV to your varsity
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
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