I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
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