Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
