I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
We're too hungover to prance.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
