No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize