his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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