i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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