He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
