My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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