true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
So much Jack, so little girl.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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