I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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