Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Randomize