btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
