Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize