Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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