I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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