areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
