I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
We have started to decorate penises.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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