why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
