we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
