That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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