I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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