new low.... made out with someone while peeing
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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