she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Be still, my beating vagina.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
