I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
How many fucks given?
0.12846
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize