before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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