im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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