He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize