So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
