ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
