So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.