it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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