I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
