Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
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