Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
