just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
