Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
sarcasm needs its own font
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
