Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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