Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
