I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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