I must be too annoying 4 u.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
